Thursday, December 13, 2007

Chemo Day Again - Ugh!

I hate Chemo Day. It's not the Chemo itself. The process is neither pleasant nor unpleasant. It is what it is. I go in, they check my blood to make sure my "counts" are ok and they hook me up through my port (which doesn't hurt) to the chemo. It's not horrible. It's ugh. Ugh as in "I wish I didn't have to do this." Ugh as in "Why me?" Ugh as in "Where's the exit?". That ugh.

My birthday's on Saturday. Christy called me last night and she and Jill are going to come over Saturday morning to spend a couple of hours visiting. They know Andrew's out of town so that's just sweet of them. Then Andrew gets back into town around 6:00 that night. That's the start of my "feel like crap" days so I've requested no cake. It would kill me to have cake in the house and not want to eat it...worse yet....I'd have no control, eat it and feel even worse. Another ugh. LOL!!

Oh! I don't think I mentioned Tuesday night on here. Oh! My heart soared on Tuesday night. My dad coaches a hockey team. He called and requested that Scott come with him so he could show the guys what he wants them to do and help out on the ice. I asked if Kevin could go and skate on the ice and he said sure. So...I went along. It was Kevin's first time on the ice since he broke his leg. He was pretty tentative at first but by the end he was skating around pretty well. It'll take some time but it was really exciting to see him back on the ice. He went down to the end where "it" happened and I thought it would kinda freak him out but he said it was fine. Freaked me out. Scotty helped coach and....wow! That kid is skating beautifully!! He's changed his whole stride and, man! He's faster than ever! My heart swelled with pride and I got all teary eyed being back in the rink. I love watching my kids more than anything in the whole world. I know you other mommas reading this know exactly what I mean!!

Well, that's all for today. I'll wander through the day, until chemo, with an ugh feeling in my stomach, knowing that I'll feel like crap for the next five days. Ugh.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

It's amazing how all the good stuff seems even better now, isn't it? Perspective is everything. Since your diagnosis, I find myself truly enjoying a moonlit night, or a song, or just knowing it's snowing. Everything has changed. Life is more precious and not to be taken for granted.

Love you huge, Sandy. You are one amazing lady. xo karen