Another Test Down....

I've decided to rethink all these tests. I was previously thinking, as the test day would come... "Another test. I'm starting to feel like a pin cushion." Well I've decided to modify my thinking. With each test? I get closer to the end. That's the only way to think about it from now on.

Actually, yesterday's test was nothing. I told him that I really didn't want another IV so I didn't get one. He just injected the "stuff" right into my arm. I have a beautiful vein. One I've been proud of for years. I show it off all the time. It's gotten me through all the c-sections and so many times at the ER for my asthma. I love this vein. Well, again, it helped me out and I love it even more. Weird? Possibly. Whatever...I do love it.

Anyway...I digress. This test yesterday was so easy. It wasn't to see if my heart was strong enough to withstand chemo, afterall. It was kind of like a baseline heart test. I guess some of the chemo drugs - especially the herceptin which I will have for a full year - can do heart damage. It's usually short lived heart damage, which is good (again, ironic, but good). Anyway, they wanted to do a baseline heart test. Then, in another couple of months, they'll do another one to see if the chemo is doing any damage to my heart. If it is, they lay off the chemo for a bit (I don't know what "a bit" is, nor do I want to know - another bridge I'll cross if I have to) until it gets back to normal. They do this over and over and over. Good thing I liked the guy who did it. He said he'll probably be the one to do it everytime. And he's cute, too - Bonus!!

You know what's weird is every time I go for a test at the hospital they marvel at how young I am. This is so nice in such a weird way. I love being told how young I am or look. What woman doesn't like that? So I'm flattered...for a moment. Then, I realise this isn't a compliment. I'm young...to have cancer. Ugh. I've been having some pretty strong ugh moments lately. But I've been told people who have a positive attitude get through this stronger and healthier so here are my positive things:

1) I won't have to wash my hair and style my hair and get my hair cut and highlighted. Now, I know that last part shocks you. Yes, I do get my hair highlighted. Most people think I have naturally gorgeous hair....I do, but I do get some help. Shocked? I know, I know - you'll get over it.

2) When my hair grows back? I will finally know what my real colour is!! I haven't known that for years. I'm really, truly curious as to what colour it will be.

3) I will not have to shave my legs or armpits for months!!!! This, my dear people, is huge!! I could even say fucking huge!!! I hate - with a passion, you can see - shaving anything. Now, listen. I've heard a few comments about me and the "F" word. Listen. I love the "F" word. My mom loves the "F" word, too. My sister Kim? One of her favourite sayings is "Fuck a Duck". It's funny!! And...what other word can you think of that can be used in so many ways - it's a noun, a verb, an adverb. You cannot be upset if I use it...afterall....say it with me, people.....I'm Cancergirl!! I can say anything I want. LMFOA!!!

4) I will get to pencil in my eyebrows. Now, this may sound bad but imagine....just imagine. I could have an angry day. a surprised day. an excited day...all with the shape of my eyebrows. jealous? hmmmmm? I bet you are!!!

5) I get to wear wigs. I can be a red head one day and a platinum blonde the next. I saw a gorgous wig yesterday that was long and curly - you know - the spiral curls I had in the early 90's? I loved that hair!! Can you say Sexy Sandy? Andrew can!!

6) I get cards in the mail. I love getting cards in the mail!!! First off - you know someone's thinking of you and I do like people thinking of me. Second off - some of them are fricking hilarious!! (see how I said fricking instead of fucking. Oh!! Shoot! I said fucking to say I didn't say fucking...damn! I said it again to say that I said fucking. See how this can keep going? I'm on a downhill swing, here, people!! uh oh!!) Again, I digress....I swear I have ADD... anyways...Keep sending the cards, please. One of my favourites is from Debbie telling me how wonderful I am. Do you know how much I love that? Of course, it made me cry - but in a good way. I've been crying so much lately that a good cry is so very welcome.

7) I get to shop. Even though it is for "cancer stuff" - no shopping is bad shopping. I'm going wig shopping on Friday and Saturday with my mom (and Kevin's tagging along on Saturday). This should be fun! I bought myself a "Cancer sucks" hat and t-shirt. I think that is so funny! True...but very funny. If anyone wants to send me anything with "cancer sucks" on it? Feel free!!

8) I've been getting presents. Oh yes! And it's not even my birthday. Mary sent flowers. Mum C sent flowers and a balloon. Kathy from Andrew's office sent a plant. Christy keeps giving me "stuff" including a gift certificate to Bath & Body Works - she is so wonderful!! Jimmy from work's girlfriend made - yes I said made! - a pretty flower arrangement. All fall-like. It's really nice!! Oh!! Jane sent an amazing book!! It's by a Canadian author who went through almost exactly the same thing I'm going through and she's a doctor. It's the best book I could get in these circumstances. A can't put it down book. Thank you, Jane!!!

9) My parents and Christy have offered to paint my bedroom!! OK! This is big. I love this. Now? I have to pick a colour. Christy!! Help me!! (I go to her house and see her walls and get the colour and paint my walls that colour - I've done this twice already and plan on continuing this trend and she doesn't even mind!! Listen, when someone like that comes into your life you gotta love it. I am not good at picking colour and she is)

10) My operation boob is all perky and will be cute when it's finished "filling in". I like it better than my "original" boob. I still love the word boob. boob boob boob boob. It's really a great word. So now I'm going to have to get the original boob "done". A girl can't have mismatched boobs. That would Just be wrong. Unreasonable.

So....that's all I can think of on the goods. Andrew isn't getting me an IPOD. He reminded me that I have one - on my phone. Duh! I forgot. So, I'm going to spend the weekend shopping for wigs and downloading songs onto my phone.

Now, I have to go clean up my house 'cause the cleaning lady's coming today. Now that's ironic.

Have a great day!